I want to help you not just survive, but THRIVE in these crazy times. I’m sending you this daily dose of inspiration, because if we set our compass right, we can sail through this!
“When we stop opposing reality, action becomes simple, fluid, kind, and fearless” – Byron Katie
Tip # 37: Surrender
Surrender does not mean giving up – it is taking action and giving 100% of your effort, but without needing to totally control the outcome. Surrender is when we understand that all the effort we put in to our actions will influence what happens, but does not control what happens.
It is effort without attachment to the outcome (which only feeds impatience and frustration) or aversion to alternative outcomes (which feeds anxiety and blame). It is knowing that movement in the direction of your goal is the point, rather than achieving it. It is doing the work without fixating on how you think things should turn out. It is being curious and trusting that you are resilient enough to deal with whatever unfolds.
There is an incredible freedom in this slight change of perspective. We can accept reality as we meet it, without clinging to an idea of what it should be. This empowers us to adapt our goals as new twists and turns happen. It also boosts our stamina and patience (patience isn’t your ability to wait – it’s your attitude while waiting).
Surrendering to obstacles we meet or unplanned outcomes (rather than being frustrated by them) allows us to see and celebrate the ways we have grown, what we have clarified, and things we learned through our efforts to get here. Surrender frees us from clinging to the idea that everything needs to be perfect, putting the emphasis instead, on the growth that happens by moving towards our goals.
Recommended Reading
Loving What Is, by Byron Katie
Determined to give people a way to discover for themselves what she had experienced, Katie has developed a simple method of self-enquiry that she calls The Work, four simple questions that allow you to see the problems that are troubling you in a whole new light. The Work is a life-transforming system for discarding the stories we tell ourselves, which are the source of our suffering, and replacing them with the truth and a life of joy and peace.
